Post of substance

New Years Resolution: Move On.

Move on. Two words that are fully loaded. What should one move on from? In my case, it's a plethora of things. I'm tired of feeling bogged down by stress. I am ready to cut my losses and move ahead. I'm not going to pretend that this is not going to be a continual struggle, but I think I'm going to win this battle.

What will this resolution require?
1) I must escape my past financial struggles of 2008 and start saving for 2009.
With a substancial amount of medical bills on top of student loan payments, I have found myself getting by with pennies to spare. I'm tired of living paycheck to paycheck, and I am now in a position where I'm making enough money to start saving. The first bit of excess money I have from my pay will be put aside. I will not be spending money on frivilous things anymore. If I am ahead of my bills and have put some in savings, then I may consider treating myself. There's nothing that I really NEED anymore, so I'm going to start thinking twice before buying.
2) I must not feel solely responsible for any relationship failure, past or present.
I cannot honestly admit to myself or anyone else, that I have moved on from the issues from this past summer. I have tried to forget about it all, but losing a friend is never easy. I have attempted to make contact, via facebook and text messages, but have realized that a reply is not likely. A fight that I figured would take just a couple days to cool down from has now spanned months, and I personally felt as though it was completley my fault. Looking back, we were both in the wrong. Name calling should not have occured, and a civil conversation should have been the way to go. Mistakes were made on both sides, so I cannot feel as though it was a one sided failure. I can only hope that time will bring an end to this, and that we can become friends again. If not, hopefully time will remove the heartache that still remains. I have also decided that the family issues that have presented themselves are ones that are not one sided as well. I just hope that we will be able to patch up relationships and continue to be a family. I would sincerely hate to see my family fall even further apart.
3) I must move on from the idea that I will continue to be romantically alone.
I am a continually negative thinker when it comes to ideas of love and romance. I have felt as though there is no happy ending for me. At 23, I have plenty of time to fall in love and get married. I'm in no rush to settle down. I would just like to simply find someone to spend time with and feel comfortable around. I am tired of feeling unloveable, and so I refuse to spend time thinking about my lack of a romantic relationship. I am a strong, beautiful woman. I have a right to be loved, and eventually someone will realize this.
4) I must move on from my physical limitations.
Everyone pledges to get in shape for the new year. I pledge to continue my healthy lifestyle. I lost 40lbs this summer, and although I've gained about 15 back, I am committed to continue losing. I have decided to continue my eating habits, exercise more and feel good about whatever size I am at any given moment. Just because I am not a size 2 does not mean that I am not healthy and attractive.

I am hoping that with my new job, revised attitude and confidance, my resolution to Move On will not become a failure. I'm hoping that with those strong friendships I do have with some people, I will have the support to move on. Just keep going. Keep believing. Keep reminding yourself that YOU are worth it.