My last post was made due to some experiences I had over the Thanksgiving Holiday weekend, and those experiences have led me to call off the relationship I had with Jordan. The strange thing is that after being together for a year, I felt no remorse or guilt for making the decision I have made. I don't feel as though I should have stuck it out in a relationship that wasn't good for me, and I'm thankful that my support system (friends and family) have felt the same. Was Jordan a good boyfriend? Yes, mostly. Were there issues that would not have worked themselves out, causing more negative than positive moments? Yes. I appreciate the relationship we had and hope that he is able to find someone better suited to his lifestyle, as I was not the one.
It's hard not to think back on past relationships and crushes and the men you admired for one reason or the other when you leave a relationship. You try not to compare one man to another, but it's a way we women weed out the attributes that we want from the ones that are deal breakers. Out of all of the men in my past, I really feel as though a person like Luke is the type of person I need. In general I feel as though I need someone who has strong family values and a good relationship with their family. I need someone who is active and doesn't mind a hike now or then. I need someone who cares about what they eat and their body and would rather come home and have a home cooked meal than stop at McDonalds 4 times a week. I need someone who is going to be a partner in the relationship, helping me without being asked and offering to cook or clean before I ask if they are hungry. I most certainly do not mind cooking for my man or making the home a clean and comfortable place to live, but I do need someone who isn't going to expect me to do it all the time without a little help. I need someone who is going to respect me for me, including all of my preferences and pet-peeves and not get upset when I try and talk about an issue. I need someone willing to communicate with me, not keep it all in and harbor resentment.
I know, to some it may seem like I'm looking for a lot in one person, but I feel as though my friend Trista said it best:
We are high maintenance women. Not necessarily in the sense that we have to look perfect all the time, be showered with gifts or expect lavish dates, but we expect the men we are with to already have the respect for us and for themselves to have already met the criteria we have outlined for our relationship. We are hard-working women who constantly put others first and feel as though we are more than deserving of a man like that. Lucky enough, she found hers. Now it's time for me to keep looking.
I re-activated my eHarmony profile and already have received some communication requests. Who knows what I may find or what the upcoming year may bring. Lets just say I'm excited to see what happens and will definitely keep you all posted.
I'm thankful that I've become this strong, independent woman. I'm hoping I can find someone who is thankful for that as well. :-)
I love you!
ReplyDelete